Thursday, February 28, 2013

Why do good men suffer?

Life is filled with a lot of sad, unfair stuff.  I have these sermon notes written in the back of my Bible.
  • Suffering reminds us we live in a fallen world.
  • Suffering helps us to see how much we need God.
  • Suffering shapes us into God's image.  Suffering is God's potters wheel.
  • Suffering is redemptive.  (ie. the Cross)
What are your thoughts friend?

Suffering... the pause in life

For those of you that read my previous post I wanted to share some more thoughts.

I was a very healthy active woman.  I did yoga, horseback riding, and hiked all over camp.  I am a pretty lively and enthusiastic person.  My recent illness caught me by surprise.  My bout of "c. diff" (see previous post)  could have killed me or changed my life forever.  The doctor told me at a follow up appointment " people come into the hospital with c. diff and leave without a colon".  That certainly gave me pause.  Life is fragile.

During those three weeks that I was deathly ill I did some soul searching. 
"Was I ready to meet God?"
"Was there anything I needed needed to ask God for forgiveness  for?"  (Yes. and I did)
"Where there any relationship issues that needed to be resolved?"
"Had I told my family I loved them enough?"
"What would my dear husband and children do without me?"  "Are they equipped to survive emotionally without me?"

Believe me, these are not easy questions to ask yourself.  Yet they are very important.  They should be in the back of our minds as we make our way through life.  It is easy to get caught up in being busy and productive without much thought to some of the hard questions.  I do not think it would be good to live life fearing the worst but I think maybe God allows suffering to help us focus on what really matters.

What are your insights?  What have you learned when life hits you hard with a "pause"?

Clostridium difficile aka c. diff

I learned more about Clostridium difficle than I ever wanted to know.  Clostridium difficle(aka c. diff) is a bad boy bacteria that can invade your digestive track and wage a war.  c. diff is one of several nasty bacteria in the Clostridium family.  You've probably heard of this bad boys cousins: Clostridium botulinum, the cause of botulism, and Clostridium tetani, the bacteria that causes tetanus.

I will spare you the details but suffice it to say what started as a case of "it must be something I ate" quickly progressed to severe bloody diarrhea.  My delay of almost a week nearly cost me my life or my colon.  I was put on a heavy duty antibiotic and a probiotic that saved my life.

c. diff can be found in many places, it resides in soils and surfaces.  It generally doesn't cause a healthy people much trouble because we have all kinds of good bacteria in our colons that keep this bad bacteria in check. c. diff is a spore producing bacteria that is not killed by alcohol based hand sanitizer.  Bleach is the only thing that kills this bacteria's spores.  Soap and water hand washing also helps greatly.  Wash your hands carefully when ever you have been in a health care setting.

The doctors believe that I got into this mess because I had taken antibiotics for a sinus infection a month before all this happened.  I usually eat active culture yogurt when I am on antibiotics... but not this time.   Since the regular flora in my colon was greatly reduced c. diff had opportunity to take over.

Unchecked c. diff can progress to a condition called mega colon.  This life treating complication can cause your colon to explode.  Very few survive this complication. 

I hope that my story can spare you this terrible illness.

Here is what I learned in MY CASE:
Do not take antibiotics unless absolutely necessary.
If you take antibiotics add an over the counter probiotic called Florastor.  Florastor is a probiotic with Saccharomyces boulardii , a strain of yeast that has been proven to keep c. diff in check.
Eat yogurt with live cultures.
If you experience unusual diarrhea or see any blood at all... go to your doctor immediately!

I AM ONLY SHARING MY EXPERIENCES.  THIS IS NOT MEDICAL ADVICE.  CHECK WITH YOUR DOCTOR FOR HIS SPECIFIC RECOMMENDATIONS. 

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Some of the best advice I have ever heard...

"Pick and choose your battles"

What's your favorite piece of wisdom?

Learning love...

They say the first five years of a child's life are the most important...

As quoted from PBS's Downton Abbey:

"What I want for her (Rose) to know is that family can be a loving thing.  Love is like riding or speaking French... if you don't learn it young it's hard to get the trick of it later".

--Shrimpy speaking about his daughter Rose whom had not seen an example of a loving family in his own home.

Any other Downton Abbey fans out there?  What nuggets of wisdom have you picked up from this colorful cast of characters?

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Loving on your disabled loved one.

Grandma had a disabling stroke a couple of years ago.  She now lives in a skilled care facility.  She is in very bad shape and spends her days sitting in a wheelchair and requires full care.  Poor Grandma!  Grandma can't fed herself or carry on a conversation.  She sees poorly, often is stuck in repeating a nonsensical phase for months at a time.  So what's a family to do?  Here are some things that we have learned through trial and error. 

Visit as often as possible.  Short and sweet is fine.  Spend more time if you can.

Talk about past happy times.  Tell your loved one about current happy times.  Mention family names.  You may get a word or two.  Capitalize on that and tell them more about that person.

Tell sad news on a relevant, as needed basis.  They may need to know that a loved one has died.  However they do not need to be burdened with the troubles of world events or the messy details of a divorce.  If a regular visitor hasn't been there for awhile do tell them that so and so has not visited because they are sick.  I think Grandma is thinking and perhaps worrying about her family.

Listen to music together.  Notice your loved ones' response... choose calming, soothing tones.

Enlarge photos to 8x10.  Photos of the kids when they were with Grandma in her younger days may connect with the part of Grandma's life that is still with her.  Past events generally stick in a stroke patients mind current events often do not. Talk about all the fun you had at the event in the photo.  You may be rewarded with a smile of recognition.

Read the Bible to your loved one.  Short encouraging passages will be good for both of you.  Your family member may be thinking about their spiritual life.

Read poetry or short, simple, and happy stories to your family member.

Have a card shower.  Send an e-mail out to family and friends to send Grandma a card with cheerful note or photo.  Read the mail to your loved one... more than once.

Go for lunch.  Patiently feed your loved one.  Plan on spending some time doing this.  Take this opportunity to chat with the staff at the table about your loved one.  Tell them that your loved one is a big sports fan, what type of job they did, hobbies,  pets, children or anything else that will make your loved one a real person to the staff.  Remember the staff probably knows nothing about your family member.  This will help the staff talk to your patient and also make the patient more than just someone to be cared for.

Take a treat.  Check with the nurses before you offer this to your loved one.    Grandma is not diabetic so she can have a milkshake.  However, thickner is added to that she will not choke as the ice cream melts into liquid form.   The staff should be happy to help you with getting this correct.  Grandma loves this part of our visit.

Give Grandma a kiss and hug.  Tell her you love her and appreciate all she did for you.

Take a box of chocolates to the staff.  Show appreciation for their efforts on behalf of your loved one. 

Be your loved ones advocate.  Be respectful and specific if you see any problems.  Go to the adminstrator of the facility if necessary.  Follow through until you are satified with your loved one's care.  Pick and choose your battles but your loved one deserves to be treated right.

Talk to the staff.  A good staff will be working on your loved ones issues.  After months and months of listening to Grandma tell us that there was " a bear-flier in her hair" one of the staff members goggled the phrase "bear-flier".  To our amazement she found that a "bear-flier" was a type of fishing lure.  With that little piece of information I asked Grandma if she had ever had a "bear-flier"  stuck in her hair while fishing with her husband.  She nodded her head "yes" and looked enormously relieved.  I asked her if she had gone to the hospital to have it removed and again she nodded her head "yes".  She finally got through to all of us!  Kudos to the staff member for solving the mystery. 
None of the family knew this story but Grandma wanted us to know.  It was a great relief to all of us.  She is still talking about the "bear flier" but at least we know what that's about now. 

Grandma I love you!

Please share your ideas on ministering to your elderly loved ones.

Saturday, February 9, 2013

What not to wear...

I have just spent the last hour in a Juniors clothing store.  I "parked" on a chair  and settled in to wait on my daughters while they shopped. 

A group of young teen girls were shopping together for some sort of dressy occasion.  I watched in amusement as they paraded in front of the large mirror trying on ridiculously short and tight dresses.  Later they began to complete their "look" with shoes they could hardly walk in.  I really don't know what they saw but I saw bumps, lumps, knobby knees and wobbly legs.  I never knew what they actually bought but I hope for their sake nothing.

Conclusion... the two rules for selecting formal ware are:

1.  If you've got to yank it up or pull it down it doesn't fit.

2.  If you can't walk gracefully in the shoes you have picked out- they are not for you.

How do you deal with modesty issues with your daughters?

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Purpose, Practice, Pilates, Prayer and Persistance

It's not always easy to reach a goal.  After SIX years I have finally become a certified therapeutic horseback riding instructor with PATH international.   This was a big goal for me.  I did not ride horses as a kid so I had to start from scratch.

My journey started on my 50th birthday when I decided that I wanted to do "something" with horses.  I didn't have much extra money so I signed up to volunteer at EquiVenture in Russiaville, Indiana.  I really enjoyed helping there so I decided to become an instructor.

Spring semester of 2006 I signed up for a class in therapeutic horseback riding at Purdue.  I spent an interesting semester there and began taking serious steps to becoming an instructor.

Having a clear plan and goal as laid out by PATH(the organization that oversees certifications) really helped me get through the whole process.  Riding, studying, volunteering and more riding were all part of the process.

I had to ride, and ride and ride.  However, just riding was not enough.   I found that I had to work even harder by going to a Pilate's class and doing strengthening exercises everyday.  Then I took more riding lessons and continued to work.

 Then came the big certification workshop in September 2011.  I had passed both written tests, the teaching test, 25 hours of student teaching only to fail the riding segment. Failure is such an ugly word.  But there it was staring me in the face.  PATH does allow one retake for the failed component.

I nearly quit.  I was totally discouraged. Both Ginger,my mentor, and my husband encouraged me to stay the course and give it one more shot.  So I hung in there and resubmitted the riding portion of the test in October 2012.

I did a lot of praying and just kept working toward my goal.  Ginger, my mentor was wonderfully  patient and instructed me in both riding and horsemanship.  In January of 2013 I received my official papers that I had passed the certification!  Thank you Lord!

What are some of your goals?  What kind of difficulties did you overcome and how?

What really matters... Number Five

Staying healthy will really help everything.  Eating right, keeping off the extra weight and exercising will make a huge difference in your life and your family's life.  Exercise should be fun... so pick something you enjoy doing and then go do it. 

What's your favorite way to exercise?

What really matters... Number Four

Quality time vs. Quantity time.  This debate has been going on for a long time.  I think that quality and quanity time with the family are equally important.  Quality time moments cannot be scripted or forced.  Sometimes the most well planned event is a total flop and sometimes a silly spontanous moment of fun just happens.

Planning quality time is important as it signals that you care enough to plan a cool outing or event.  Quality time often makes some special memories.

Quantity time is when you usually have those important conservations with the kids.  Quantity time lets things flow in their own good time... maybe late at night or in the car but it is important to be there. 

What's your favorite way to spend time with your family?

What really matters... Number Three

The family dinner is a precious moment that we take for granted.  This is the time that we can gather after a busy day and share  prayers,  thoughts, encouragement , and  a laugh.  It is so easy to dismiss this as unimportant.  Busy evenings, sports schedules and all manner of good things can push the family dinner to the side.  I am going to work on making this a priority in our family life.

What's your family's favorite meal?