Tightwad

Yes. I admit it. I am very, very frugal.

I will share a story out of my life. My oldest daughter is very artistic. For her 24th birthday she wanted the whole family to go to a ceramic shop and have each family member paint and glaze a cereal bowl for her. I must admit that I complained about how much this was going to cost and even tried to talk her out of such an expensive birthday treat. In the end I agreed and begrudgingly paid the bill.

As it turned out we had a fantastic afternoon as we painted and laughed together. I apologized to my daughter for complaining about how much it cost and told her it was a great birthday party.
The bowls turned out beautifully and she has a special bowl that reflects each family member's personality.

Two months later...
An uncle who attended the party passed away very unexpectedly at age 53. I almost missed making a very special family memory because I didn't want to spend the money. I am reminded of the story of the woman who poured the expensive perfume on Jesus' feet. She was rebuked by some of the disciples for wasting money that could be used to help the poor. Jesus replied " Leave her alone, Why are you bothering her? She has done a beautiful thing to me. The poor you will always have with you, and you can help them any time you want. But you will not always have me." Mark 14:6-7

Every day is a gift.

Farewell to Frosty... see you next year!

Just say "No"

Safety
Is your child on Facebook? If so you need to find out how much of your personal information your child has posted on the Internet. Some kids just post their name, address, phone number, cell phone number, and looking for a relationship without a second thought. Kids are often tricked into being friends with stalkers. Stalkers are very clever and have a million different ploys to become "friends" with your child.

Privacy
Parents that allow their children to be on social networks like Facebook, My Space, and Twitter need to be extremely vigilant about what is posted on social networking sites. I often hear parents defend their child's Facebook activity by telling me it is private and only open to their friends. First do you really know all of your child's Facebook friends? How much time do you have to monitor their social network activities? Second, there is nothing posted on the Internet that a smart stalker can't find out.

While you may think you are keeping track of what is going on another common trick is for kids to create two Facebook pages; one for their parents to see and one that the parents do not know about for their friends. Please be wise enough to recognize this as a possibility and don't get caught in the mentality that your child "would never do that". Check things out.

Bullying
When I taught high school I was shocked at the amount of bullying that occurred Facebook. People will say things on Facebook that they will never say to a person's face. Nice, student council type kids would find a victim and set up a group to pick on a fellow student. In a high school setting the victim has no place to hide from the wolf pack that surrounds them. Things spiral downward for the victim and the perpetrators don't get caught because they never quite cross the line of mentioning names or being libelous.

Sex
Many after school sexual encounters are set up on Facebook. Purchase parental controls for your computer and don't allow kids on the computer when you are not around to be the POS (parent over shoulder). Your kids will be annoyed but that is your job as a parent. Keep your kids accountable as to their whereabouts after school. Come home from work early occasionally just to check up on things.

Just say "No".
I do not think children should be allowed to have a Facebook page until they are in at least 11th grade. While this is very "uncool" it will save you a ton of headaches. By the time a child is in the upper high school grades most of the middle school meanness should be over. You still need to be very vigilant about how much information is posted and actively teach your student to be both safe and smart. You need to have a Facebook page yourself so that you can keep track of things.

A personal observation...
When my daughter was in 7th grade she really wanted a Face book page. We said "No". She was mad but life went on. Now she is a Freshman and still does not have a Facebook page. Recently a young 15 year old girl in a near by town was picked for lunch by a 19 year-old Facebook boyfriend. She did not return to school on time. She was sexually assaulted that afternoon and then showed up at school at 3:30. It was not the "lunch date" she had in mind. Our school superintendent talked to the students at our school about the dangers of Facebook. Our daughter, now convinced the parental units are not completely stupid came home and said "Mom, Dr. ____ talked to us about Facebook and he said the same things you do." While she won't admit it I saw the relief in her face. When the parent says "No" you are the bad, uncool guy and it takes the pressure off your student. Put up with the fuss your student will make and stand firm. It will pay off in a few years.

Valentines!

I have always enjoyed this cheerful little holiday in the middle of a long winter. I remember stopping at a little downtown bookshop when I was in high school and carefully picking out special Valentines for each of my family.

I recently ran across and old Valentine from my childhood. It was from Mrs. Marie. She was a sweet lady that lived in my neighborhood. She sent 100's of cards to many, many people. Her dinning room table was stacked with cards and she was always busy sending cards that cheered and encouraged everyone she knew. If you were sick you would be sure to get a card from Mrs. Marie.

Mrs. Marie remembered me on every holiday and every birthday. Mrs. Marie didn't just send me a card, she sent me a special card. The card in the photo has a miniature card inside for your doll. I always looked forward to Mrs. Marie's cards because they were special.

This dear lady was just an ordinary person but she touched the lives of all those around her. She invested in others and brightened many lives. Her investment in others was consistent and thoughtful. She was a sweet lady.

Please share your ideas for investing in others.

Homemade Ice Cream

For each person you will need:
1 quart size zip-lock bag
2 gallon size zip-lock bags
Ice (lots)
Rock salt
...and the recipe below:

Mix together:
2 quarts of whole milk
1 cup of sugar
1 cup of cream
2 teaspoons of vanilla
1 can Eagle Brand (the optional secret ingredient)

Pour 2 cups of the above mixture into a quart size freezer zip-lock bag. Seal tightly and squeeze out as much air as possible. Place this bag into gallon size zip-lock bag. Seal tightly and squeeze out as much air as possible. Place these two bags into another gallon size zip-lock bag. Fill this outer bag three quarters of the way with crushed ice. Sprinkle lots of rock salt over the ice and seal the ice bag tightly squeezing out as much air as possible. Wear mittens and shake the bag till your ice cream gets solid. Eat immediately! Enjoy!

Do you know where you are going?

Do you know what your destination in life is? Without a clear destination you will find yourself and your family wandering aimlessly through life or perhaps arriving at a place that you don't want to be. Having a purpose and a plan will help you get where you want to go.

I would invite you to develop a family mission statement. Your mission statement should reflect your goals, values, and morals. What are you trying to accomplish with your children? What will your children learn from you? What will your children teach your grandchildren? What will the great-grandchildren carry on? In the business of everyday life it is easy to forget that daily habits and attitudes can carry on far beyond your lifetime.

I want to leave this world a better place and I want my children to also make a positive contribution to others. Here is my family's mission statement:

Our family will strive to discover our God given gifts and talents. We will develop those gifts and use them to further God's kingdom in service to others.

Let the journey begin!

Winter Wonderland