Priorities

What are your priorities? Do you know? In other words what is most important in your life? You need to have this one correct in your life because it has very long term effects.

Here are some examples of wrong priorities:
A minister that values the needs of his church over his children's needs.
A husband that values only his wife's beauty.
A father or mother that climbs the company ladder at the expense of their children.
A parent that allows a hobby or interest to take priority over their family.
A missionary that sets aside their own children's needs for the needs of others they are bombarded with.
A wife that simply pursues material possessions and gets caught up in "keeping up with the Jones".
A father that wants to make his child a sports star at all costs.


Our priorities determine how we spend our time and money. This has a huge impact on how we live our lives.

The Bible gives us clear guidance on this question in these two statements.
"Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind".
"Do unto others as you would be done by and love your neighbor as yourself".

First we should love God.
Second we are to love ourselves.
Third we are to love others.

Loving God with our heart, soul, and mind gives us a worldview that is larger than ourselves. Our human perspective is very, very, limited and it would be easy for us to fall into a hedonistic*, self-centered lifestyle.
* hedonist- living for pleasure, seeking self gratification.

Loving ourselves does not give us permission to simply live for our own selfish interests. However, loving oneself is quite necessary for us to be able to love others. Self hate leads to a crippled life complicated by self-doubt, guilt, and an unhealthy body. We are UNABLE to serve others if we do not love ourselves.

Loving others is a great investment. Our families should be the number one "others". Your children will know where your heart is. Missing this one has very long term consequences. If you love God and take care of yourself you will be able to raise children that will put God first in their lives and love God with their heart soul and mind.

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well". Matthew 6:33

Weird things my Mom says and what they mean...

Look before you leap.
Spend a lot of time with your intended before you marry him or her. The rest of your life is a long time and divorce is very, very messy.

Check out the pros and cons of a job before you take it.

Do some independent research before you invest your hard earned money.

A stitch in time saves nine.
Fix it now or it will be a bigger repair later (and cost more money).

Fish and company stink after three days.
Remember this one - especially if you're the guest! Your host will love you for it!

Big hat no cows.
Remember that the Jones' that live next door are probably in debt up to their eyebrows. Everybody that looks rich isn't.

A penny saved is a penny earned.
Every dollar you waste is a missed opportunity.

Sip all day get decay.
Lay off the sodas.

A man's work is from sun to sun but a woman's work is never done.
I am a mother of four ... do I need to explain this one??

Fools names are like their faces always appearing in public places.
Thou shalt not scribble your name, or phone number or anything else on the bathroom door.

Make new friends but keep the old - one is silver and the other is gold.

Get a job.
You'll do yourself a favor.

Idle hands are the devil's tools.
Kids and adults without responsibilities are likely to find trouble.

Get out of bed. Get busy.
Don't let life's difficult circumstances stop you from being productive.

Turn off the TV / computer / video game.
Do you have a life or are you watching someone else have a life?

Get a life.
Accomplish something that is tangible. Definition of tangible: something that can be touched, something that is real. For example: knit a scarf, plant a garden, or give the dog a bath. Sorry, high score on a video game does not count!

Life is short.
Don't let another day go by without letting your family members know how much you love them.

Don't throw your pearls to swine.
You will encounter those who will not listen to wisdom. When you meet mockers and scorners don't waste your time, energy or wisdom on them.

Work real hard for about ten years and you'll be an overnight success.

You reap what you sow.
If you sow stupid you'll reap desperate.
If you sow a plan and work hard you'll reap success.

Brainy, Bright, and Interesting kids

As you plan your children's activities this summer I think that it is important for your kids to have a good mix of different kinds of activities. Those children that only play sports or video games are missing out on using all areas of their brains. Music, sports, arts and crafts, games, gardening, and reading are all fun activities that will exercise different parts of their brain and will help children develop into smart and interesting people.

Remember it is the process not the product that is important here. So let them sing off-key (loudly), scribble away, and strike out. It's all good even if they do it badly. You're seeing to it that your kids are using all of their gray cells by stimulating different parts of their brains.

Thought for Mom and Dad... how are you doing in this area? It's important for parents to have a mix of activities too. Don't become a workaholic or a mono-hobbyist. Life will be more fun for you too.

Tightwad

Yes. I admit it. I am very, very frugal.

I will share a story out of my life. My oldest daughter is very artistic. For her 24th birthday she wanted the whole family to go to a ceramic shop and have each family member paint and glaze a cereal bowl for her. I must admit that I complained about how much this was going to cost and even tried to talk her out of such an expensive birthday treat. In the end I agreed and begrudgingly paid the bill.

As it turned out we had a fantastic afternoon as we painted and laughed together. I apologized to my daughter for complaining about how much it cost and told her it was a great birthday party.
The bowls turned out beautifully and she has a special bowl that reflects each family member's personality.

Two months later...
An uncle who attended the party passed away very unexpectedly at age 53. I almost missed making a very special family memory because I didn't want to spend the money. I am reminded of the story of the woman who poured the expensive perfume on Jesus' feet. She was rebuked by some of the disciples for wasting money that could be used to help the poor. Jesus replied " Leave her alone, Why are you bothering her? She has done a beautiful thing to me. The poor you will always have with you, and you can help them any time you want. But you will not always have me." Mark 14:6-7

Every day is a gift.

Farewell to Frosty... see you next year!

Just say "No"

Safety
Is your child on Facebook? If so you need to find out how much of your personal information your child has posted on the Internet. Some kids just post their name, address, phone number, cell phone number, and looking for a relationship without a second thought. Kids are often tricked into being friends with stalkers. Stalkers are very clever and have a million different ploys to become "friends" with your child.

Privacy
Parents that allow their children to be on social networks like Facebook, My Space, and Twitter need to be extremely vigilant about what is posted on social networking sites. I often hear parents defend their child's Facebook activity by telling me it is private and only open to their friends. First do you really know all of your child's Facebook friends? How much time do you have to monitor their social network activities? Second, there is nothing posted on the Internet that a smart stalker can't find out.

While you may think you are keeping track of what is going on another common trick is for kids to create two Facebook pages; one for their parents to see and one that the parents do not know about for their friends. Please be wise enough to recognize this as a possibility and don't get caught in the mentality that your child "would never do that". Check things out.

Bullying
When I taught high school I was shocked at the amount of bullying that occurred Facebook. People will say things on Facebook that they will never say to a person's face. Nice, student council type kids would find a victim and set up a group to pick on a fellow student. In a high school setting the victim has no place to hide from the wolf pack that surrounds them. Things spiral downward for the victim and the perpetrators don't get caught because they never quite cross the line of mentioning names or being libelous.

Sex
Many after school sexual encounters are set up on Facebook. Purchase parental controls for your computer and don't allow kids on the computer when you are not around to be the POS (parent over shoulder). Your kids will be annoyed but that is your job as a parent. Keep your kids accountable as to their whereabouts after school. Come home from work early occasionally just to check up on things.

Just say "No".
I do not think children should be allowed to have a Facebook page until they are in at least 11th grade. While this is very "uncool" it will save you a ton of headaches. By the time a child is in the upper high school grades most of the middle school meanness should be over. You still need to be very vigilant about how much information is posted and actively teach your student to be both safe and smart. You need to have a Facebook page yourself so that you can keep track of things.

A personal observation...
When my daughter was in 7th grade she really wanted a Face book page. We said "No". She was mad but life went on. Now she is a Freshman and still does not have a Facebook page. Recently a young 15 year old girl in a near by town was picked for lunch by a 19 year-old Facebook boyfriend. She did not return to school on time. She was sexually assaulted that afternoon and then showed up at school at 3:30. It was not the "lunch date" she had in mind. Our school superintendent talked to the students at our school about the dangers of Facebook. Our daughter, now convinced the parental units are not completely stupid came home and said "Mom, Dr. ____ talked to us about Facebook and he said the same things you do." While she won't admit it I saw the relief in her face. When the parent says "No" you are the bad, uncool guy and it takes the pressure off your student. Put up with the fuss your student will make and stand firm. It will pay off in a few years.

Valentines!

I have always enjoyed this cheerful little holiday in the middle of a long winter. I remember stopping at a little downtown bookshop when I was in high school and carefully picking out special Valentines for each of my family.

I recently ran across and old Valentine from my childhood. It was from Mrs. Marie. She was a sweet lady that lived in my neighborhood. She sent 100's of cards to many, many people. Her dinning room table was stacked with cards and she was always busy sending cards that cheered and encouraged everyone she knew. If you were sick you would be sure to get a card from Mrs. Marie.

Mrs. Marie remembered me on every holiday and every birthday. Mrs. Marie didn't just send me a card, she sent me a special card. The card in the photo has a miniature card inside for your doll. I always looked forward to Mrs. Marie's cards because they were special.

This dear lady was just an ordinary person but she touched the lives of all those around her. She invested in others and brightened many lives. Her investment in others was consistent and thoughtful. She was a sweet lady.

Please share your ideas for investing in others.